The world system of support is people/Merry Christmas!

To all my friends, my family, and to all that be:

Happy holidays, merry chrismakahkwanza, what have you.

Mostly to all the people who don't read this, but even more to those that do.

I want to say that I'm thankful for all that I'm living for.  I want to thank those others like you living.

Delightful.

I love the love you've given me.

[I'd like to give it back like life to my dead cat.]



I'll be "here" for a while.

Wont you just be with me :)

Thanks to all those who's floors I've slept on, whose stories I've heard told til they're Gold. To the one's who have passed along wisdom or food, I'll remember all of you when I am old.  Until then let us be friends.

Lots of Love all over the World,

Sean

Pushing Perspectives

A nice view from the cliffs at sunset.

I've been going out just to take pictures lately.  I need constant stimulation I think.

Everything offers some perspective even if you don't see it right away.

A camera is a cool tool to capture perspective with

!

Elisa is an excellent expert harpist.

The other night I ate dinner with my back to her and her harp and I suddenly found myself dining in a medieval royal castle with a Chinese fire-breathing dragon keeping guard outside the gate!

When Sir Gaelen strolled in with his armor on I invited him to drink mead with me and recount the days battles.  He said it had rained and was soon thereafter seduced by the music.

Unfortunately for me Sir Gaelen caught the glance of the harpist, as he faced her.

They ended up fooling around in fantasy-land long before I.

I think it was grilled cheese.

Or somethin'

The Moon was HUUUUUGE the other night!!

I wanted to see it over Mt. Baker but this was the best I got while driving home, hahaha.

I like purple.

The Hand of God, UBC

Some random girl at the UBC cliffs was kind enough to trade up her zoom for some shots with my fishy.  It was a nice sunset :)

That's right, good clean fun with a fisheye.

I focking lahve those colors.

Charles and George had an impromptu stare-off on the 43.  When I say this I mean:

Charles decided that whoever sat in the pair of facing chairs in the accordion part of the bus had to compete with him in a stare-off.  Luckily for everyone, the first victim was George, a friendly yet formidable opponent surprisingly enough.

He sat down.

Charles sat down.

They laid down the rules and it was ON!

George was totally into it and Charles was ready for the challenge.

Check out everyone's expressions, haha.  Busses are really interesting social spaces.  Everyone has different manners on the bus, you treat people differently, some people consider it some sort of private space while others argue that it is totally shared, public space (which I agree with!)

The stare-off captivated everyone for a solid three minutes until George blinked.

The wager of $1.25 and a smack in the face was recanted by a victorious Charles.

We got off at the next stop.

Late night walk through Nitobe Garden at UBC after a couple hours of indoor soccer?  Why not?

Noel, Chuck, Doug, Amine, and I cruised threw for a warm-down sesh and some photos.

The photos didn't turn out

This guy really took a dive.

Interurbanism

Sitting wishing disappearing into a thin strip of cold air slipping slowly from under the door.  I wish I could go away with it into the mountains and just turn into snow.  For now it's hope.  Hope that I too can slip through the crack in the door.  Hope that snow actually is coming.  Hope that somewhere there's someone enjoy a warm breeze as much as I enjoy mine cold.

Whistler beckons.  I applied for three jobs there today after striking out completely yesterday on Broadway.  If I get one its to the snow I go.  Bummer :)

Here are some photos of the installation Charles, Paul, and I put up at the Interurban Art Gallery.  Paul has some way better photos of the final project.

Rough frame of one wall.

Paul sat across from me when we took a break to go get grub

He took this phots.   Burgers, yummmm

Ready to get on up!

Charles scoping the room out.

I got Olympics training today at four and Cagefighting (poetry night) after that.  Finally a few things to do to get me out of this jobless monotony.

Until the next time...

Sean

More skiing to come

I have gotten in 6 days so far.  Looking to up that soon.  Wednesday?  Yes.

I went home to see the family for Thanksgiving.  It was really nice to be home for more than one day.  Dad took Erin, Will, and I skiing on Wednesday.  It had rained the day before.  The snow was shyt compared to the stuff all week at Whistler, but we shralped anyways.  We always do.

Will and Erin up on Seventh Heaven.  Steven's Pass, WA

After skiing we went home and baked Mom and Dad an apple pie.

Step one-ish

My sister!!  Hi Erin!!

Step twoish

Step freeeeee

And we don't have any more pictures cause we ate them too  :)

Sean

Trying hard.

Somedays, when I am without you, when your breath goes unheard from my ear, I long for the whisper of the wind to deliver something to me.  I am not in the sunshine anymore, I am not in the hostel house with my hermanos.  I am not in the empty streets of capital cities who couldn't care less about my presence.  Away from the rivers edge, I am at an ocean.

You are a rockstar in another place.  I like your style like I like your face.  Something's lost but something's gained.  Nice to know but in the end if you're not with me what?

I am in the process of putting more photos up and trying to print a bunch and put them up somewhere.  So if you know a wall that needs photos let me know.  I am trying.

Tomorrow I am going skiing.  Over 50 inches in the past two days.  INCHES!!  Vamos!!

It is all happening.  I sit here in the Interurban Art Gallery where I am helping install a piece with my friends.  We have been having a super good time.  We are all in the same place in the physical sense and in the head as well.

And I think the head is so important.

Sean

No Time for Fall

It has been raining for days. House music blasts its beats through my open ears as I sit here typing. I can still hear the rain on the roof, the bass in Gaelen's room, the leaves quivering with wind, all wet and heavy and bright against the evergreens.

I don't mind the harsh transition from 26 degree sunny days in Montevideo to 7 cs in the rainy city and snowing at Whistler. We've gotten 164cm (there you go, Lukas!!) or 64 inches of snow in the last week. Last Saturday was the best opening day I have ever skied. Decent coverage, not toooooo horrendous lift lines, and a good crew made it a memorable one. Oh and there was a ton of snow :)) And more to come...

Extended forecast for Whistler - Blackcomb.
Wednesday.. Cloudy with flurries. Snow beginning late in the day.
Snowfall accumulation 15 to 25 cm.
Freezing level 1000 metres.
Thursday.. Periods of snow.
Snowfall accumulation 25 to 35 cm.
Freezing level 1000 metres.
Friday.. Snow.
Snowfall accumulation 15 to 25 cm.
Freezing level 1000 metres.
(http://www.whistlerblackcomb.com/weather/forecast/index.htm)

So on top of the 164cm an additional 75cm makes for 239cm in the past two weeks. It's gonna be good. Expect some photos sometime. I am in the midst of uploading photos and emailing them to so many people right now. If you are one of these people or want to be one of these people send me your email and tell me what photo you want and I'll do what I can. Check in to my facebook too...

In the meantime finding a job is harder than I thought and ski season is all too tempting (especially with all the snow right now). If you know anyone who needs an able body, lemme know.

I think I'm going skiing on Wednesday and then the weekend. Gotta get the days in while I can...! See you on the hill!!

Sean

ps-

an old one of Chuck sharfin the gnar

Consistent consistancy

Just did my first day of Olympic training here in rainy Vancouver. I shouldn't say rainy, but that's what it has mostly been, save for a few wonderful west coast sunsets with the city and skyline set in front of the mountains. And about those mountains around this time year: when it rains in the city its snowing up there. That is why I find it so easy to love to wet weather we have here. It's just not enough to be wet, you gotta be cold too!

Olympic training was super fun. We tooled around for the day in some new GM suv thing we'll be shuttling clients around in during the games. Pretty sweet to check out where the venues are and what not. The Richmond Olympic Oval (ROO) is dope. Really really cool architecture and sustainable too! They used a lot of pine beetle damaged wood for the gorgeous interior of the complex. It's going to look sick on TV!! But ya, anyhow, I'm really looking forward to this winter. First some pow, then some Olympics. Good deal.

But now, how about an adventure?

It was Mikel Bock's birthday the other night so we honored the 21 year young man by heading out to Richmond for some skate action. The park's got lights til 11pm!! It was pretty quiet until these guys showed up...

Wham

Galen laying some rail down

Whoosh

Birthday boy Mikel sailing easy breezily

Wee

Paul Rarick gets high!

Whatup

Pibes de pavement

Oh kay, so next we went to the Chan Centere to do more cruisin' with Chuck and Ben and some girls that showed up. Continued fun with turtles and elevators. Not in the elevators though.

Level 1

Thanks tortuga!

Look ma!

Charles with a no hand manual...!

YO!

Ben pushing buttons at the Chan

So that concluded skateboard foto phest twofounsandnNine fantastic for having you.

Alright, the other day Gaelen, with whom I live casually let Charles and I know that "yeah, there are like two couchsurfers coming today." Ok, cool, no problemo. "Ya, one of them is hot, don't know about the other." Better. "Ding-dong." Why hello, welcome.

Thats not even the picture of "the hot one" though I must clear this up and say right now that they were both quite pretty and wonderful girls. One French and one Slovenian. Both work in Tacoma as au-pairs and found it pretty funny that all of us in the house are from the Seattle area. Chuck and I toured them around Vancouver on Saturday after some pesto on Friday night (delish). Stanley park, Granville Island, everything touristy. And they bought magnets and clothes and lots of fun stuff. Thanks for coming if you read this, girls! We had a good time with you in the house :)

And a sidenote/point of awesome awesomeness:

HAPPY 1.2 BIRTHDAY CAGEFIGHTING

These cupcakes were absof***kinglutely delicious!! Tofu frosting, baked in orange rinds and so, sooooooo rich y riquisimo! The poetry was very good. I'm super glad to be back with my people, haha. In my absence the group has grown and the quality/quantity/energy gotten better, closer, warmer, something. Thanks guys, you're the best.

Well I gotta take off here. I'm trying to get a job as a volunteer blogger for Whistler. I fit all the requirements (be there during the olympics) and would love to do it but I gotta go write two more blog entries. One about my best day of skiing last year (which I will relish recounting) and the other about the Peak-to-Peak gondy (which I someday want to jump off of, haha).

Here are a few shots from Montevideo para mis amigos ahí. Les extraño mucho. Espero que todo está bien en la casa!

It's Sam in the hall!

Sam in the hall

Jammin' out

This is a kick-ass photo. I like rock and roll.

And that dude is a rocker.

Peace, love, and snow,

Sean

Bienvenidos a Vancouver

Greetings from Vancouver. This is Alexandra Compton. She is awesome and a mastermind.

The leaves are falling as easily as I into winter here in Vancouver. There are still colors. Real maple leaf red like the flag and the leaf or an orange of a sunset at sea, it is torn between orange skies and blue sea, if you see what I mean. I like the lazy rainy days when the fire feels warmer than it is when I'm sitting playing drums in the corner with Charles on the guitar microphone. Thinkin damn it feels nice to be home. Alone?- not so. I got the homies like you don't even know- reading poetry and cooking chocolate gold, you know you know.

But here a day is cool.

Try to find a job.

Eat food.

No heat in the house.

Play with our cat, Squirrel.

Jam out.

Photos.

Help film some movie with Charles.

Cook food.

Eat Food.

Squirrel eats food.

Play drums!! and organ and guitar and with awesome people :)))

Write a poem.

Go to bed...

It aint that much different than when, back then back then sitting on the techo getting closer to heaven with Sebastian and Sam, they got the master plans, but I still have a key that Seba gave me. I love it when its sunny outside in Montevideo. I am disappointed to be missing summer there having arrived back in the classic Vancouver haze of rain and wind for days, the sun pokes out but never stays for long until the snow. That's what I'm here for. And more.

Pictures as they come...

Sam-I hope Bolivia is rocking. Send me photots pronto amiho.

To all, thanks for reading this the last five months. I am back in Vancouver. I surprised the friends and they were so excited one of them pooped himself! HAHA, that is not true.

We have couchsurfers here at home and I have Olympics training tomorrow. Exciting times.

Now I am happy but it is not sunny. I have my computer but there is not asado. Bummer of a trade. I'll be back.

In a very cold closet in Vancouver,

Love,

Sean

ps- And this blog will DEFINITLY continue randomly with some sort of consistency, hahahaha

You know I gotta get up on it.

Face to Face

I'm saving up the words to say I love you. I've waited months to hear your voice and now it grows near. Are you an illusion? Do you mean what you say? I'd love to take you up on anything you offer. I'd love to stay the night. I'd love to love you as you wish. I love to hear you say you love me. I love to know you mean it. I'd love to have a dance with you. I'd love you feel your energy.

I'm cold you're radiating. I can feel the vibes. In the coldest of winter, melt my snow. Make me feel like summer time.

Can't wait to see you Face to Face http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tT7GzgmNRn4

Love,

Sean

Medling around in Montevideo

I felt like Scooby Doo the other day. We snuck into the old train station. Pretty sweet place. Would be an awesome concert venue. Maybe someday I'll buy it...

Here are some photos from around the world and a song to go with it...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFwQoqbWgSs

Alejandro, Gaucho extraordinaire.

The day I showed up at the house to new windows. It looks nothing like that now...

Some of the homies. From L-R: Sam, Seba (back with cup), Mariañita, Anthony, and Noelia.

Victor grindin heard to first place at the Pocitos skate comp. 16 year old skating phenom.

Tatafornow,

Sean

Muck fe I got robbed

Who wouldn't want tickets to the biggest futbol game this year? An epic matchup between arch rivals Argentina and Uruguay, played here in Montevideo tonight at 8pm. So I was walking along the Rambla towards Pocitos on a wonderfully sunny day with a new friend when a man who I'd met a couple weeks ago noticed we were speaking English and piped in. We had just passed a sign inviting Montevideans to be nice to tourists. The sign reads "1 turista, 1 amigo." The guy's wearing gold rimmed sunglasses and doesn't take them off. He somehow seems friendly enough, but I should have known from his New York Yankees hat that he couldn't be trusted. He speaks English and Italian, my friend does too. Everything seemed cool. He mentions casually that he's on his way to buy tickets to the big game. I thought the tickets were sold out and he confirms this. Abitab (the legit seller of tickets) is out and he's on his way to his buddy's house to pick up some tickets for himself. I ask if his buddy has anymore and he says he'll call. He tell his friend that his brother (me) and sister (Irene) just came in from Buenos Aires and want tickets and after some banter we seem to be getting some numbered seats for the game. We get to the the building and he tells us to wait outside. He has to go into the office for a second and since reselling tix is illegal he thinks its best for us to chill outside. Now I don't know this dude's name, don't have his phone, no nothing. I am used to having good luck and encoutering friendly people, such as this guy, so I have no qualms handing over 1,000 pesos for two tickets. Irene thinks different but we still let him wander into the building. "Two minutes," he says.

HAHAhahaha.

Two hours later. Our eyes had been on the door the entire time. Eventually Irene had to go to work so Sam came to give me some backup and we go looking for this shady fucker. Of course the building has a million exits. He probably went in one door and out another.

Knowing how small Montevideo is and that I've already run into him at least once before I have full confidence that this dude's time will come. Like next time I spot him I am going to follow him until I can properly attack him and take my shit back. Hopefully Sam will be there so we can pin him down and leave him with nothing but his shoelaces holding his hand behind his back, his pants on his head, and his belt in his mouth. I hate being tricked. I hate feeling like an idiot. But an idiot I am for this one.

All in all I must say karma is a wonderful cycle. Remember that thousand pesos I found on the floor of the hot dog stand a week back? Ya, I put that back into circulation. I figure you gotta give back somehow...

Sean

I am 22

As of today I am a new number. I woke up this morning after a very fun party last night and felt nothing. Not cold. Not hungover. Not old. Not like I needed to brush my teeth (even though I did). Not like anything except well rested and satisfied with my life thus far.

It is fun to be where I am. It is more fun to be going places. I don't know where, but they all seem alright right now. And I can go anywhere. Anywhere will work.

I thoroughly enjoy all the kind words and well wishes today on the 12th of October. Thank you to all my friends :)) I love and miss you all. I will be home sooner than you think.

Sean

ps- I've always found it ironic that I was born on Columbus day. Here in South America the 12th is la Dia de La Raza! A day to acknowledge all the indigenous people white people like Columbus put an end to. A day for me, as an anthropologist, to reflect on my confused discipline. All the people here find it hilarious that I studied anthropology and was born on la Dia de la Raza. I find it fitting. As a Libra it reminds me of some kind of balance in my life.

Magical Montevideo

Some more photos. We'll see where from.

Less talking more pictures :)

The mural in the main room. Done by ALFALFA, a street artist here in Montevideo. His real name's Nico and he's a very rad dood. I think he's going to paint the middle of the beast you see. It needs some more spots or lines or polka dots.

Sebastian by a vendor of used junk at Mercado Tristan Narvaja. The market takes place on Sundays when the streets are closed to traffic and pedestrians take over. A solid five square blocks make up the market where you can find literally anything. Broken windows, projectors, bicycles, books, shoelaces, tarantulas, turles, motorcycles, fruit and veg, empanadas, doorknobs, compact discs, underwear, babies (okay maybe no babies). But seriously. Literally anything. Here Sebastian debates the price of a box of old slides.

One of the four consecutive streets full of books at Tristan Narvaja.

A neon shoelace vendor at Tristan Narvaja. Pretty bright.

A view of just a slice of Pocitios. Its one of the nicer neighborhoods in Montevideo. The rambla continues all around the city and the other day I rode nearly the entire thing. Beautiful, right along the river, and super sunny.

This is a really beautiful color. I really like it. The car is pretty sweet too. It's got a little bit of woody action on the sides and the back. People come to the rambla to show off their cars and bump their sound systems. I wish I had my Benz to show off too :P

Sunset at the Pocitos skate park. Wicked competition and sunset to boot! :)

All of these were from Montevideo. I'll post some older ones tomorrow :)))

Peas and luv,

Sean

Sunny Day Bike Ride

Today it is sunny out. Summer is (almost) here. It is enough for me though the Montevideans say otherwise, noting the other night´s rainstorm and the chilly breeze that keeps the heat from penetrating their warm skin. They love the sun here. I can´t wait to get some snow.

I took a step towards you today. I think you took a step away to tease me. Like when we almost kiss, lips glancing and then a subtle laugh as the air embraces them with emptiness. I think you like to do that. I know I do.

The sun warmed me, woke me up, inviting me to enjoy its company today at a normal hour. I wanted to keep dreaming. We were on a balcony without a railing and you pushed me in a playful way. I nearly fell but you grabbed me by the collar and held me, feet on the tiled landing, head hanging over the sidewalk below, in perfect control. Like had you given me a nudge I would have surely fallen into uncertainty. But you pulled me close and whispered something I agreed with and we both smiled and the wind disrupted the unequal equilibrium and brought my body back to its upright position. When we went to walk inside the doors were closed so I punched a hole in the glass and wiped my bloody hand through my hair and later on your face and you tasted my blood and you loved it. Somehow we managed to squeeze through the tiny window and onto the couch in the living room and into one another and out again to the balcony later when I awoke.

The pigeons outside my room shat all over the passersby below on the side of the street and cooed so pleasantly that I forgot about their shit and the passersby too. I woke up to this and ate some peanuts and drank some coffee and waited for the day to begin and then for it to pass so night could come and we could be together again somewhere new. I walked up the stairs to the kitchen and then back down to the store to buy milk and then back up again to put milk in the coffee and then further towards the sky to the roof where I watched time pass in the shape of cars and trucks and people on errands. And I pretended to be a bird by calling out to the people below for no reason. And I contemplated jumping, thinking that today is a good day to learn how to fly. Then it occured to me that today would not be a good day to die. So I sat on the edge of the roof and continued my careless cooing like the pigeons only with less feathers and less shit.

I listened to Thom Yorke whine as I finished my coffee and played around on the piano desperately trying to find the right chords for a song I´ve had stuck in my head for a month. I found them. They are the most boring chords one can find. Now I have no desire to write the song. I dissapointed myself but at the same time I was proud that I failed such a beautiful song. Failure is at the heart of art. Often I find out of a thousand photos maybe ten are worth a look. Of a million words I pick a single line and discard the rest into a forgotten history of failure. That´s a lie, I can´t forget them, sometimes they haunt me. When I find I have written the same thing twice I feel as though I´ve somehow cheated. Like two photos of the same thing; one horizontal and one vertical. What is the point? Not that you know. Not that I know, I still do it after all.

Today it is sunny out. I think I´ll go for a bike ride.

Sean

update: here's some photos. more exciting than words :P

Seba working on the mural in the lime room. Pretty cool style. Lots of colored dots on an old wall that we chipped the paint off of. Undernearth the white wall was blue, then green, and finally tan. This chipped paint wall serves as the base of the mural and looks a bit like a map of the world. I think its cool.

Typical Sunday on Calle Andes. Asado (BBQ) in the middle of the street with everyone in the house and our friends. Traffic is super slow, a random taxi every now and then or a hungry cop salivating behind bulletproof glass. I usually feed strangers and make friends easily with good meat. I love this city.

Dancers at the Dia de Patrimonio parade. These older folks always followed the bikini girls dancing candombe. The old men did the silliest dance and the women all fanned themselves and danced a kind of samba/candombe. Beautiful dresses, beautiful women, and goofy old men. Que bueno.

I found a thousand pesos on the ground in a hot dog stand yesterday. This was after the skate competition I got to photograph where one of my new friends got second place. And after meeting some crazy people in the skateboarding scene here in Montevideo (which is pretty strong, surprisingly enough). See if I can't get some photos published...

Sam has gotten me sick. I haven't been sick in a long time. I really don't think about getting sick and so I never am sick. Well now I am sick and it sucks. It's kind of a nice relief not to crave beer or cigarettes for a short respite. My throat burns and I'm all congested.

There was a huge thunderstorm last night in Montevideo. The lightening lit my room up and the booming thunder shook the glass in the windows. It was crazy. It rained so hard I was afraid there would be a pool on the roof in the morning and I hoped I had shut the hatch when I left the roof earlier on in the day when the sun had been so hot I sweat myself to sleep for a nice siesta.

This morning I helped Pepe and Seba move demolition rubbish in dumpsters around the city. Then Sebastian and I bought some CD's. Best of Radiohead and Is This It by the Strokes. I told Sebastian about how I just convinced myself to stay in Montevideo until late December after wanting so badly to go home. Well I got more on that.

I got an email from the Vancouver Olympic people about my volunteer position for the Paraolympics. Apparently training is in early November. So home might be closer than I thought. After having convinced myself to stay here I feel like a fool for wanting to go home knowing what is to come in the next few months here. If I can't move the training around, then it looks like I'll be couchsurfing Vancouver starting November.

I got a job at a hostel the other day. A night shift Thursday to Sunday, 8pm-1am. Play music for the guests, cook frozen pizza, and do dishes. I'll get paid for how much beer I sell (believe me, I can sell beer) on top of my wage, whatever that is. Now that I'm all thinkin of home, I have no idea what to tell my potential boss. "Yeah, I might just drop off the side of the earth here in the next couple weeks. That's cool, right? Like, you'll still pay me?"

After finding a thousand pesos on the ground the last thing I really want to do is work. My luck usually works out in the end anyways.

Wow, hope than interested all you die hard readers.

Sean

ps- I feel like shit :) more soon

Oh the days just pass

The days are flying by here in Montevideo. I spen most of my time still working around the hostel, planning parties (good business), and trying to find that elusive job. This journal entry is from a few days back but I like it...

Today the twentysixth of September, 2009

Today was la Dia de Patrimonio here in Montevideo. The sun was shining and you could feel summer teasing you as the last of the winter winds blew futily. There was a three hour parade of candombe drums, falg wavers, and hardly dressed dancers along the 18 de Julio (the main drag) and traffic was diverted for the second night in a row. Yesterday I enjoyed the Marcha de Diversidad (Gay Parade) with Isabel and Chelsea who flew in on a whim from Chile, escaping studies and a rainy weekend in Santiago for the nicest weekend (and weather) I´m so far seen in my month in Montevideo. This place is spectacular.

Through all of this preperations for the party tomorrow (Sunday 27th) have been ongoing for nearly a week. Pepe installed a new water tank that promises to deliver more than the piss stream of warm water I´m grown to call a shower. But it is already out of order thanks to a water main burst that happened the night after I lost my key in a car full of drunk strangers. Later that night I left Emil in the street with a bum as I scaled the balcony and up into my room. I saved Emil and he and I tried to push the bum out of the house: literally pushing him as he fought back trying to get in the house. The bum had some steep demands. First Emil´s cell phone (no go) then, in obvious desperation, "cien pesos" (100 pesos). Well "no tengo cien pesos, amigo, lo siento." (Seriously, I had no money.) "Cien pesos, cien pesos, cien pesos..." After a thirty minute standoff he reluctantly fucked off, leaving me worried still that he might climb up like I had and try his hand at revenge. I sleep within an arms reach of my gaucho knife, so that helped put me to sleep.

Anyhow, back to the party prep. We have a new mural, courtesy of Alfalfa, one of the more reknowned street artists here in Montevideo. Black and white line drawing on an orange wall in the living room. Looks sick. At present a doyen new photos hang on the black stripe of the lime striked dining/family room and some paintings, and there are blacklights and plastic fruit on the wall and white stripes on the ceiling and the balcony doors are open to the fresh air and the slow traffic on the street below. And the people down there know us and I hope they like us or at least don´t give a shit. Today, the night before the Piedras de Afilar domingo fiesta, the weather is warm and the women wonderful. Today I just found the world worth wandering.

I´ve neglected you, dear journal, yet again for too long. But the days go by with so little sometimes, aside from a good meal or human touch, I hardly feel like wasting words in the present. Instead I wait to reiterate in past tense WHAT HAS GONE ON. That´s it, the shit I was there for. Now I´m on the couch by the balcony listening to some artist called Bebe with two beautifuly giggly girls who are in a most "artful" state.

(Page of inappropriate poetry in Spanish written by Eugenia who is more giggly that beautiful right now)

Eugenia, la loca poeta, writing something nice? Yes nice. Like most the people here. Like Nico the muralist and Adi the guitarest/ex-stranger on the street, no my friend. And Mariana, and Sam and the faux Canadians on load from Chile and half the German crew and more. Of course there´s always more. So when you fin yourself with a ten person dinner party with more than a few different flags at the "table," you don´t think anything of it here at home. And strangers, passersby, bums, they have all been known to frequent our humble abode.

And I do mean humble. Even before the water main burst water was an on and off issue. Like sometimes it was on and the toilets flushed. Or sometimes it was off and you conveniently couldn´t do dishes for what can only be called "un rato." Un rato, what a great word to reflect the Latin AMerican sense of time. The bus is always coming in un rato. I always nap for un rato. Appointments are sometimes held up for many a rato until you are waiting at a coffee shop about to close, hours after the agreed upon time. "When is he coming, when are we going?" "Un rato."

So it´s a house full of good guys. When something doesn´t work we fix it. When something´s dirty, though not often, you fall drunkenly to sleep only to wake not soon before noon to random girlfriends of roomates cleaning your kitchen. In less words: shit works but it aint always pretty. Except our walls of course. That I suppose is the curse of an artist´s residence.

The photos next to our room are less scandalous than those in the lime room. The black and white walled nook is the best place for pictures in the house, imho, and it´s nice to wake up and ponder them in the mornings. I often wonder when everything will come down. When new things will go up. Sebastian wants me to put up some photos I´ve taken so I´ve got to go print some and then cook some food.

Seeing the UBCers makes me wanna go back. I heard Charles was on skype and that I missed him. I always do. It looks like I still have no idea when I´m going home but it probably won´t be soon. Christmas, New Years, something like that. In the meantime here´s my address for all who care to send me a letter or a CD or something. I do miss rock and roll so hook it up. I´m bummed I won´t be back for my birthday or Dip´s or Kaely´s (yay October babies!!) but I´ll be back sooner than you know it...

Sean Mullany
Calle Andes 1261
11100 Montevideo
Uruguay


Hasta pronto,

Sean

The Aftermath

So the party was fantastic. Thanks to all the Canadians who showed up, haha. We danced, we drank, we had good fun. I painted peoples fingernails black to make sure all had paid and took down names and said ridiculous things only a non native Spanish speaker can get away with. Oh it was grand. Can´t wait to get back to Van and do it with the homies. But Vancouver is looking a bit further away despite the snow that has already begun to fall up at Whis. That´s right bitches, I´m watching it. Once the base is good yall know I´ll be home, hahahaa.

I read some poetry in Spanish. The people liked it. I was scared and I shook in the cold steel chair and when I was done I had to run away for a moment just to calm myself with some grape juice. Now its sunny out and I have job offers in Montevideo and I´m printing pictures for a portfolio and working on the hostel that I will be coming back to work at next year. This place will be sweet in time. I´ll upload some more photos later today or tomorrow. This computer is such a piece I wont even bother trying to upload for fear of losing all my photos.

If anyone wants to come visit me in beautiful Montevideo lemme know. Summer is just beginning and the appeal of the beach is growing daily. We got some surfboards and some thumbs so I think an adventure to the waves is in order. More on that later this week. Isabel and Chelsea, friends from UBC studying in Chile stopped by randomly for the party, catching some fine Montevidean weather and taking advantage of the free theater week thats going on here right now. They said the theater sucked. I guess there´s a reason why its free.

I have a little poem/story to share as well. I wrote it back in Argentina but I figured nows a good time for someone...its kind of a dream sequence and it jumps a lot. So it kinda sucks and needs a lot of editing. But I like everything better raw.

1
Loose lips left lingering kisses on rose red cheeks, burning with passion like a midday rainstorm. A pleasant disruption from the normalized monotony of another day, the rain washed the sin from our hair. Each drop falling hard and finding its way to my scalp. Each kiss pressed hard to your heart. You said to me, soaked in rain, that to drink the drops cleansed you "inside out," like the rain did to the streets, sweeping away the shit that would otherwise sit stagnet in the gutter waiting to be washed. I said each day the rain renewed me, left me feeling like a clean street, ready to be beat down again and again; defeated daily.
So we fell like rain everyday into the oceans of eachothers bodies, the vast unknown awaiting exploration. When the clouds refused to drain their spirits on our own we took time to wander in the parks around the city. I plucked flowers, purple lavender and poppies, their modest scents agreed with ours and and drove me wild as they mingled, made me only want your more. Alone at night I dreampt with you, connected in the ether where a million minds wandered simultaneously.

2
The first time I remember touching something in a dream I awoke immediatly. It took me years to hone my mind to give in to itself, to control its startling. I had dreamed with all my senses since youth, but smell came first and most naturally and most pleasantly , without effort. And it was here, now in the ether, that your first drew yourself to me. At least that is the story I believe myself to have dreamed.

3
It was quiet in the city. Taxis broke the morning mist, tracking exhaust in their breeze. And people walked in the streets visibly exhaling breaths that lingered before fleeting. The certain smell of coming rain rose slow and silently from the asphalt. Its unmistakable scent I recognized immediatly with ease. Throughout the day I waited for the rain to cleanse the masses and at noon the fog had risen and the sky was vanishing, covered quickly by a thousand clouds full of all but mystery. The future can be told in clouds if only you can dream. And so I did and rain it poured until the streets became like streams. All the while I watched the scene unfold still waiting patiently for another certain scent to drift into my lucid dream.

4
I remember the fresh summer scent of lilacs licking my nose as I studied your naked body next to mine. A cool draft blew in through a broken window pane delivering me something: heaven scent. I lied to you and told you I could not see the scars that marred your back, your perfect skin. I knew that you would never see them even with the aid of a mirror. You lied and said you loved me. Still today I´m unsure whos lie was worse.
New breezes brought boquets to your balcony where we sat reading eachothers poetry and body language. I could have written a book on lies alone. "Close your eyes and zou´re alone. You´re far away but you´re at home. Anywhere you go, you know I´m with you, no, you know." My ironic lyric tickled you, I saw it in your face and in your bigest tells of all: the fanning of your fingers, your desprate need for some embrace. I alway hesitated but I also always give more than I take so when your insecurities surfaced I tried to build you up with grace. And what I got still tortures my senses in the middle of some nights. Your scent moves like a nightengale, it is silent but it is bright, it flies through my mind but vanishes faster than the speed of light. Into the ether that surrounds us all again.

5
Blood rushed out of the stormdrain, tracing back accross some sidewalk, and into my body mouth, face, skull. Belly flopped I´m rising higher, faster than an elevator, screaming forty floors until I slow and finally, find my feet. Each step taken away is taken like it´s been done before. As if I knew what was to happen before I opened the window. Before I closed the door. Before I hit the button. Before I closed the door. Before I turned the car off. Before, before before.
Death on pavement lets an odor go. The life we live while in the air is all we care to know.
Don´t tell me that the future is faster or that I am already old, you know that what we "know" is what we "know," becasue we have been told. But tell yourself a lie, "yes you are young," and see if it will hold, you know we only know just what we know because we have been told. I don´t believe myself, you know I´m certain I´ll die before I´m "old." But please remember that no matter what, no one mans words are gold. We all die no matter if we´re "old."

6
Confused like a hot tap gushing cold. I am lost in a place that I don´t even know. I want to push it, open the tap a little more, but it runs away like ice melts in your palm. And I remember back when I was young how ice hissed in my Coke before it cracked and left me sitting there so wattered down at home. But now just doesn´t that time fade into space or to another realm, replacing things to be replaced, replacing time itself? Why don´t the clocks keep ticking on their own time, why do they need our help? Our hands are all the same. We can shake them, we can shout, we can casue alarms so harmless and can also be so loud. Without our hands or eyes or heads our hearts would hardly have a place to go, someone to see, you see time makes us feel so proud. Because! We made it and believe it so much without a doubt. If time was gone what would we care about?

7
Having a hard time finding my way into the ether, its not the drink, I got no drugs, so I know it´s not neither. I haven´t lied in days, no that´s a lie, I haven´t lied since yesterday, well here it is I´m wide awake and still the ether that I know is here is weak.
I´m swimming through an ocean of ice, there are hot waves that break through, but each stroke is a fight. You are drowning but I can´t do a thing. When I dive down to get you I freeze up and then I see bubbles. You´re breathing just fine. I hate that you´re wasting my time. Like a fisherman fishing with no hooks just line, I wrap you up thinking you´re mine. But you slip away into seaweed and ryhme, "You. You don´t have a clue. You´ve got bait and a line, but you got no hook."
Well what do you want me to do? I´m drowning just trying to listen to you. I will wash up on the beach white with sand. You will never see me again. I promise. Now that´s a good plan.

8
Underwater, underground is filled with space and silent sounds. The bubbles carry breaths away with air and empty space. Sinking faster throught the dirt, the well is wishing deeper things like fairytales so timeless they have never even been told. So swift water rushed from our bodies and our minds. They together all at once remind us we are one. The dirt we eat is time we take, is food our only sustinance? Does conversation nourish us or are words, as people, fake? Now floating faster winds awake, my eyes are open as the sea is great. How much water can a wish displace if dreams take me to outerspace? Reality, eternity: they fight but they are both for me.

10
Once I rose from the ashes spit from a furnace into the navy blue sky. I sweat, sheets twisted at my feet, mattress soaked in the shape of a body. Into the atmosphere I becasue, finding myself and in a trillion places. At once I was lost and found. At once I was hot and cold. At once I was everywhere and nowhere as my ashes covered the ground.
You swept the walk in your garden. I fell into the rows of fruits and flowers, giving my dry flesh to the earth. What did not land in the planters was treated like dirt: swept up, removed, and forgotten. At least you were clean.
You took a sip of water. The falling ash agitated your throat, made your voice raspy and rough. And I couldn´t find all of me in your garden, nor in your body, though I took a look just to see.
On the ocean I fell and was carried to beaches when I soon turned into sand. Each wave brought new pieces and parts into being, before long the tides returned me to the sea. The trade windsnpulled me apart as I sailed on their swift currents. Warm breezes brought me into port cities where people came and went. Into rivers I fell and was delivered to soil or lakes or deltas or the mouths of fish. It were the fish that helped me return to myself in a night, I thought impossibly. Some fisherman caught me. They sold and they bought me until again all ended up in the sea. Eventually everything finds itself somewhere, that somewhere for me was the sea.

11
Pause. There she is. Her eyes already own me. Her spirit intertwines with mine. But it´s not like that´s never happened before. It´s always been this way. I´ll come back and get you even if you don´t want me. I gotta fight myself before I take you on. I know I´m right, I know we´re wrong.
You say something I´d rather not hear and I reply, "I think you´re pretty when you´re quiet," and so it goes. And you are not beautiful at night, but when the lights are on you turn me on, like them, if that´s alright. I think it´s alright. And you say, you say that you don´t lie, but I can see straight through your eyes, you´re wrong, I´m right. You lie, you lie.

Ah, wow. That is brutal.. Yea, I know I skipped 9. It wasn´t that good anyways, hahahaha. There is a lot more but in time it will come. It all comes back to the city and it is beautiful like all you people.

And tomorrow I will post photos and maybe a journal entry if I feel up to the task. THanks for reading all my bs :)))

Sean

Ha!

I just wanna go home or at least just find some place I don´t feel so alone. But with my friends and family (and things that are so familiar to me) I can´t seem to bend the boundaries restricting me from everything, eternity, infinity. Not that immortality is something that I want to touch or even get to know (that much). Fuck responsibility , we´re animals, we need to be alive right now and find some food some blood or warm skin we call love and love and love and love.

So here I sit in front of a glowing screen that seperates me from reality. It´s lost in space. The light´s surreal and so devouring and tames my time I´ve saved so diligently. But what are we doing here. Why are you here? I think I don´t know, but really I don´t want to. I don´t want to think or write or breathe. I don´t want to come or stay or leave or even find another place to be. I just need mountains and the sea. I just need dirt and food to eat. I just need friends and family. I just need strangers in the street. I just need something endlessly. I just need decisons made for me. I just need something endlessly.

Some say I´m something that I´m not. Some say that this should bother me. I could run away or turn around or put another person down or refuse to smile for a week or laugh or kiss you when we greet. But with a world so full of us I rather lets us love. I´d rather not spend my precious time wating it on hate. I´d rather let us love.

I´m here and hungry cooking something I will give away. It not that I don´t want to eat I just know my friend, you´re starving. I see it in your hollow face and in the skin stretched tight over your ribcage. And in your mind you think its fine but time tells another fate.

Time tells us when to pause and when to play. Time tells us not to wait. Time says a million seconds can´t amount to much but time is so cliché. Infinity exists right now as it does after mortality. There´s nothing quite so grand as death in one´s own mind but in reality its grave. There is nobody watching me but still I can´t escape their gaze.

I want to push away, away. Away to other days.

Sean

Durmiendo

Primero de la tierra y despues de amor. Buenas temas.

La tormenta viene con presión, gritando!
"Por que te ensucias la tierra?
De donde eres, quien representas!?"
Le dije soy yo en palabras verdaderas.
Me gusta la tierra como me gustan madres.

Durmiendo contigo en tu cama.
Exploré tu piel, explorar tu alma.
Todavia adentro pensar en mi cabeza,
la infinidad de tu belleza.

Son simples. Como yo.

Sean

A little something from everywhere

We're having a party on the 27th of September if anyone wants to come. It's going to be off the hook. Got a couple of bands a poet and a contemporary dance troupe coming in from Buenos Aires, along with the usual Montevidean suspects. Should be a good time. You are all invited. And you can crash at the house. Hope to see some Norteamericanos show up, hahahaha.

I've been writing very basic Spanish poetry. Sometimes in English poems can get a little out of hand. I am enjoying the simplicity of basic words and very honest sentences. I think these poems are great because they are so straightforward and understandable. Sometimes poems are difficult to understand, difficult to get a solid feeling out of. Sometimes poems are just words with little meaning behind them, just words. After reading some poems to friends here I realized how childish they must sound to a native Spanish speaker. Hemingway believed that writing simply allowed for the truest sentences to emerge. I am with him. I'll post some once I've gotten them grammatically reworked. For now the simple words are complicated by grammatical madness.

Even simpler than poems are pictures. One unified statement, no periods or commas, just one thought to put out there. Here are four (an extra one for Mayss :P )

Cool things:

Alejandro, Adolfo, and Balduena subdue a formidable oponent before surgery. The other horses in the background look on awaiting the same fate. Great demonstration of teamwork as it takes three or four guys to take down a pony. For an old man Balduena works quick. But no one can tackle a horse quite like Ale, crazy gaucho. Adolfo just likes to talk them into tranquility and is quite good at it, being the head horseman on the ranch.

Sariel takes a break from being extreme. Bluebird day with a meter of fresh the night before made for some powdery dreams. Some people were saying we got the best day in five years. Add two for one lift tickets to the goodness and you get some very happy skiers. Valle Nevado, Chile. (ps- Ski Washington sticker, represent!!)

Sunset on the rambla. Todo el mundo (literally, everyone) shows up on the rambla when it's nice out. Sam and I joined the happy throngs of locals, passing by the skate park and palm trees that line the riverfront on bicycle one night. In the summer there are open air beach dance parties that take place every Saturday night. It's just now starting to get warm here, so I'm looking forward to staying a little longer to fully enjoy life here. Montevideo, Uruguay.

I thought it was fitting to follow a photo of a sunset in Uruguay with some stars from the jungle in Ecuador. There are SOOOOOO many. Totally rearranged for someone from the northern hemisphere, but just as enticing. The stars down here shine hard. Now that I'm in Montevideo I can see only a few stars from my rooftop (and Venus :) which is nice but nothing compared to the infinity on display in the lightless jungle, highland Peru, or Argentine campo.

I am torn as to where I should go next, if I should go anywhere. If I go home the dream ends and a new one begins. If I backpack to Peru I will be on the road again, away from the comforts of one of South America's nicest cities. If I do that I'll hit Paraguay and Bolivia before getting to Peru and undoubtedly encounter some serious adventure (which is always fun ;)

I have no idea what I want to do besides something tomorrow. Help a brother out and give me some suggestions, por favors.

Until next time,

Sean

ps- if you want settings for the shots ask :) None of my photos are altered by photoshop or nothing. Just light and a camera.